Hazel "mailto:tips@thedailybeast.com Erotic Massage ❤️❤️❤️

About Mons

So, mate, picture this—some bloke I knew, yeah, swore them erotic-massages cured his bad back. Bollocks! Came out smellin’ like lavender and regret, he did! Cost him a tenner more than a regular rub-down—sneaky buggers, them masseuses! Little known fact, precious—back in old Thailand, they’d mix fish oil in the rub, stank like a riverbed, but folks swore it woke the “energies.” Energies, my arse! We hates it! All that kneading and moaning—too close, too sticky!